July 23, 2006

  • Contemplating Life...


    I am trying to find my nitch in life...Rings any bells???


    I am really feeling God calling me to something...Mom says she is gonna pray I am wrong, cause it's not her idea of my future:) I still really haven't sat down and shared all of my thoughts with my folks, but there are a few things that I need before I can consider myself ready to present it:)


    The other hard thing is there are certain feelings, that I thought I had hidden really well that are coming back to haunt me and I am feeling a little, not confused, maybe annoyed? and the direction I feel God is leading versus where I want to go!


    How dare I , a humble sinner argue with an almighty God!


    I feel God calling me to a ministry/school of sorts, that is within my dad's guidelines, but not in the location my parents would prefer, such as in another country:)     It wouldn't be anytime soon, more like a year or two down the road.


    But, I have only ever wanted one thing, as lame as that may sound, and that is to settle down with my cowboy in our little cabin and raise lots of little cowboys and indians... I still dream of the gingham on the table and the matchign curtains on the windows and my sisters coming over to help me with the munchkins cause I am a million months pregnant with baby number whatever:)...


    You get the picture...I just have to wonder why God gives you two desires that are totally God glorifying, but one would truly give the desires of your heart, whereas the other is truly giving over your own desires to fulfill His will for your life...


    I have to admit, I kinda keep hoping I am making the whole thing up about the mission field one, cause it's so far away!!! I mean really, who's gonna keep kissing my baby for me while I am gone? ( BTW< , he totally kissed me ON THE MOUTH for like 10 seconds today!!!! I was totally thrilled Back to topic;):))


    Anyhoo, all this to say ,. keep praying for me and my family as we continue to strive to follow His ways and not ours.. As you can tell, I am trying but not terribly succeeding:)


    XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Comments (16)

  • Wow...that is a tough situation, Jess. If God leads you there though, I'm sure he'll make that your desire and your delight. He is a kind God and He likes it when His children are happy...in Him. So whatever His will ends up being for you, I'm certain you'll be glad in that.

    I do know it's hard, hang in there and don't be afraid to run hard down the path that He calls you! I look foward to seeing what amazing things God does with your life - whether that be in the states or in a humble village half way around the world!

  • Hey Jess,

    Ok so I can totally understand and identify with what you are going through. In fact, I'm dealing with the same thing, just the opposite of your problem. For what its worth, I don't really want you going half way around the world either (at least not without me...... ) I look forward to you getting the info and sharing it with me..........man that thought makes kentucky seem really ok.........(DON'T get any ideas, I don't want you going there either) You are in my prayers girl, I know everything will work itself out, and that God has an amazing plan for you (and it probly includes that cowboy somwhere in there........) And as Zak already said, I can't wait to see all the years of dreaming and anticipation begin to play out into a marvelous story that not even the two of us could have dreamed up...........Love you!

     ~Laura~

  • EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW! A kiss on the MOUTH?!? .......I'm assuming it was from Stephen ( please Lord!)......Don't you realized that baby's mouths(cute as they may be) are totally disgusting?!? Puke, baby food, and anything else they can get their hands on! YUCK!!!! 

    Praying that your mouth is sanitized and that your cowboy will come riding on his trusty steed (very soon),   Adrian

  • LOL. Eh, a 10 second kiss on the lips with a sibling is rather disgusting in and of itself.

    But if that's what floats your boat...

  • I'd have to agree with Zack on that one. *shutters*

    Somtimes God might want you to give up a dream just so he can turn around and give it back to you. But I'm learning that I am supposed to happy and content to serve in the area that he has given me right now in this moment. And for what it's worth I really wouldn't want you to run off to the phillipines or some place like that before I actually met you.

    Ok, how are you supposed to settle down with a cowboy and raise little cowboys AND indians? Oh....I get it.......you're the indian.

    Kevin

  • I love you guys!!!!

    And yes, a kiss from Steven does float my boat:):):) *** His mouth is not disgusting!!!!!:):):)

    We'll see guys, the Lord is calling me to be right where I am for now, but this would be in a little bit...!

    Thanks so much for all your notes of encouragement though..I really needed them today!

    We left our church last night and not but 2 people of the 45 said goodbye!!! I am really trying hard to not feel the way I wanna:) So i really appreciate your comments and you all don't know how much I needed to hear them:)

     Jess:) 

  • Hey guys,

    I love you all!!! You have no idea how much I needed to see that this morning!!!

    You are all being so encouraging!!!

    We officially left our church last night and only 2 people said goodbye to me...My best freind there and her brother...

    Needless to say, the love you guys just showed above means alot...

    Thank you all so much!!!!!

    Jess

  • Switching, leaving, changing churches can be very hard.  I know what you're going through. Being a PK, changing churches is part of the lifestyle. It's not fun to say the least.

    Cheer up, every day's a new day!

    Kevin

  • Do you know where y'all will be going to church now? Praying for you and the fam, ~A

  • Surely something new has happened that you could write about. Or maybe another thought provoking LONG post?

    We've had two kids saved at this bible school so far!! :)

    Kevin

     Oh, and btw. I've heard that you've been teasing a certain person about another certain person. I can't believe that you'd do something like that. It just shocks me. That doesn't sound like you at all.  ;)

  • oooooooo.......who are we teasing about who? huh? Huh? HUH???? Are they a cute couple? Are they alot alike? Do I know who they are??  FILL ME IN ON THIS ONE!!!!!!! hehehe *evil match-making grin*

  • A, just sounds I little eager there. ^ She scares me.

  • I scare you? Thanks alot!  I truly hope you know I was just kidding (kinda)!!  ; )

  • Call me A, and I'll give you ALL the details:):):)

    * winks at Kevin while grinning evilly:).... J/K..........................................................................................

  • You scumbag.

  • ;)

Comments are closed.

Post a Comment